So What Now?

I was talking with a friend recently, just catching up and chatting about everything. We got to the point of sharing some struggles, and it was quite easy for me because I had recently just poured out my heart to God after dealing with a terrible mental breakdown and I was feeling pretty good. It was relieving to know that I was not alone in my struggles. I hear it a lot, but I always feel that people say it to make you sort of ignore your problems and get on with life and probably just show up for them even when you don’t feel up to it. I had been overthinking a lot of things, especially about my future career, and she mentioned that I’m in a new place and no matter what I think or feel, it’s not something I’m used to, and it will take a while to learn and adapt. So, I should stop beating myself up and appreciate my efforts and little progress, embrace every new knowledge I’m gaining and let myself just be. I just started to validate myself and my emotions and she hammered on that. Show yourself grace and be intentional.

She said something about our present moment, present opportunity, present space, and everything that is just present. Yes, we have dreams and goals, but “now” is ours for the taking, to own and to fully explore. I feel like we all get this kind of motivational speech more often than not but I don’t why this time it was just different. Although, I often try to remind myself that where I am now, was a prayer point and dream a while back, so I try to acknowledge progress and growth. I always thought that choosing this career will be it for me, and I prayed and relied on God and it felt like God said “Yes! Go on ahead. This is what I want you to do. This is the path I created for your life. This is your purpose.” But now that I’m here I’m just so overwhelmed and questioning myself.

"Stop trying to handle everything and just embrace the moment that God has given you. Let God lead and you follow." Not her exact words but that was the advice. Talk about reflection and gratitude, but more about the doing. Maybe you're hoping for something else or something more, but what about this current space you're in? Will you just let it pass you by? What can you do to make it count? As a lesson or stepping stone... You're always thinking of what next to do and waste you the present moment worrying and anticipating, when you could just get busy right now.

The question is not 'what next' but 'what now'. We're only sure about the moment that we live in and it certainly is a gift to be used. Why are you anxious about what you do not know when what you know is starring at you in the eye? Time is not yours, but you have the 'NOW' to 'BE' - be a friend to someone who's feeling down, read your school books even though you feel you could have done another course, (these examples are personalized, lol) but just BE. In this moment that you have been gifted, JUST LIVE. God owns the now and the next, but He has given you the now - so what now?